Can I date while separated before divorce? is there a chance for this to happen?
The short answer is probably not, but you may have already heard that from your attorney. If you are considering dating during separation, it could mean that you do not have plans to reconcile with your spouse and view your separation as a path to divorce.
However, you can make decisions as an adult even when your attorney doesn’t like them. You may begin dating as soon as you are ready after your separation has been formalized.
This article examines why people date during their separation and the possible complications that could occur.
Can I Date While Separated Before Divorce – 13 Reasons Why
Why can’t I wait anyway?
There are many reasons one may have to resume dating while separated.
Whatever it is, such a person should be firm and ready for any consequences. Below are some reasons why some people must act before divorce. And they Include:
1. Need For Companionship
A sense of belonging is established via companionship, a fundamental human desire. No matter if they are a family member, friend, or caregiver, having a companion in life keeps the mind active and avoids social isolation.
Some people can be lone rangers, but others need a shoulder to cry on, ears that listen and arms where they are welcome.
Such persons will dislike being single for a long time. Some people crave being involved in a romantic relationship, even when surrounded by friends and family.
2. An Affair
A committed love relationship in which there has been cheating is called an affair. It’s typically regarded as infidelity involving a strong, passionate emotional or physical relationship.
Rarely is a one-time occurrence referred to as an “affair.”
If you were involved in an affair before your separation, you will only likely continue. The reason for the separation could be the discovery of the affair by the spouse.
In such cases, the affair continues during the separation. There is no need to cover up something that is already exposed. Just get ready for the possible consequences.
3. Rebound Relationship
A rebound relationship is one in which a person who has recently concluded a loving partnership gets involved with another person despite not having emotionally recovered from the split—after a split, entering a new relationship swiftly is possible.
Intentionally or unintentionally, you may start seeing someone as a reaction to your previous relationship, especially after s serious relationship like marriage. It does not mean that you love the person.
Think of it as a psychological reaction. This relationship is often confusing for both parties because one person still obsesses over the past relationship.
You should watch out for this if you tend to be clingy or have an anxious attachment style. Rebound relationships hardly end well and could be damaging for the people involved.
4. Distractions
Some people may resume dating during separation to take their minds away from what is happening. Such people cannot handle the emotional rollercoaster that may accompany a separation. As such, they choose a new romantic relationship as their preferred distraction.
5. Love Happened
In some cases, people genuinely find love during their separation. It doesn’t mean that they were unfaithful in their marriages. Maybe they met the person while separation, or the relationship kicked off when those separation papers were signed.
What are some things to expect and things you could do?
6. Challenges With Child Custody
If you are dating while separated, your spouse may oppose you being the child’s primary guardian.
After all, the child is theirs too, and they have a right to decide who their child will be around.
If your new love interest has a shady character or your spouse doesn’t like them, it could spell doom for you in the child custody settlement.
7. Prolonged Divorce
A partner who feels scorned by the idea of you being with someone else is likely to frustrate you during the divorce settlement.
They can decide to get their pound of flesh by bargaining hard to get a better deal, even at your expense.
Together with their attorney, they can come for your head, and you may find yourself in a tricky position, especially if the judge needs to be more emphatic about your decision.
8. Unexpected Pregnancy
Although it doesn’t have to, an unexpected pregnancy can negatively affect your relationship.
Unexpected pregnancies can be too much for some newlywed relationships to handle. This doesn’t indicate that your relationship is doomed; rather, it only means that events occurred at the wrong time.
If you choose to date, avoid getting pregnant as much as you can. Pregnancy will prolong your divorce because the child’s paternity must be ascertained so proper arrangements can be made for child support.
9. Living Arrangements
Your partner’s attorney can argue that since you will be sharing a house with someone else, your partner can pay less alimony.
House rent takes up a chunk of monthly income. Since you will be sharing it with someone, it can be argued that compelling your spouse to give a larger amount of money to that effect is unfair.
10. Relationship Timeline
Your partner may suspect foul play in your new relationship and decide to dig deeper. If they uncover evidence that the relationship started before the divorce, you could be accused of adultery.
Your partner’s attorney may attempt to prove that you were spending marital assets on your love interest. This can affect how much you walk away from the marriage.
11. Communication With Ex-spouse
Before seeing someone, you should talk to your spouse about it. You are not yet divorced, and they are still part of your life despite how you feel about it.
Talking to them can allow you to gauge their reactions to the idea of being with someone else. This can help you decide whether to proceed or wait.
Communicating with your spouse will also reveal if they still want you back. If they do, you can also expose your feelings and firmly state that you will not return.
12. You Can Date Your Partner
Dating while separated is not always with a new person. Sometimes, the couple can date. After all, separation does not have to be the end. Some couples date all over again while separated.
This can be useful for reconnecting with your spouse and deciding if you truly want to leave this person.
If both of you harbor thoughts of reconciliation, separation can help you walk towards sorting things out.
13. Prepare For Divorce
Separation can last for so long for some people. If you are serious about your new partner, it is in your best interest to ensure that the divorce comes along quickly.
Else your new partner could harbor suspicions about your intentions concerning the relationship.
Finalizing that divorce proves that you have moved on from that phase of your life and are ready for a new one.
Conclusion
Dating while separated is not cheating. Most likely, you do not want to be with your spouse again. The key here is ensuring that your spouse is aware and confirming that they have no intention of getting back to you.
It is advisable to wait till your divorce is finalized before seeing someone else, but if you must, be aware of the complications that may arise and plan for them accordingly.
